Here are four updates from past letter-writers.
1. Should I give professionalism feedback to a “nepo baby” summer intern?
Things with Reece last summer got worse, not better. I’d thought he was just rude, but it turns out he was also lazy and incompetent. Any time his project lead would ask him to do anything, he’d say he’d already done it or didn’t have time to. Meanwhile, he slept at his desk or streamed TV.
I took the advice of commenter “nnn” any time I was asked about him during his stay — I told others that he seemed unhappy and didn’t say much more than that. I also took your advice and didn’t sit him down for a big career talk that he hadn’t earned.
He accomplished nothing all summer except for bringing down our collective mood, then he left for his senior year of college.
After his departure, I asked some of the supervisors in my area if I could give negative feedback to the summer intern program. The answer, in more words, was no. It was very clear that the same intern without his connections would not have been able to dodge this feedback. My grandboss admitted much later that her boss had told her to treat Reece with kid gloves.
Many new graduates enter our agency via fellowship programs (including me, many years ago). Well, you don’t get to be as old and seasoned as me without learning a few tricks. I contacted my old fellowship’s hiring manager last fall and told them under no circumstances should they hire Reece, and they took it seriously.
But there are multiple fellowship programs at our agency, and this week a newly graduated Reece finally showed up in our staff directory listed under a different one. It really gets up my nose that he’s skated into a lucrative (for public sector) job while so many of his peers are graduating into an apocalyptic job market. But the world just isn’t fair, not even in the civil service, where our hiring practices are supposed to be above reproach.
Best of luck to all the job hunters out there having to make it on your own merit!
2. My coworker and I attend the same sex club
I never ended up running into that coworker at the club and she moved to another state so the issue remained theoretical.
It does seem like a lot of people in my field go to that club though. Once I was able to go to work on a Monday and — because of a conversation I had in the club that weekend — update my team on a person we worked with at another company whose FMLA leave had been affecting our schedule. I had met someone from his company and she mentioned that his knee surgery was mostly healed and he’d be back at work the next week. Only that coworker knew exactly where I got my intel.
3. My coworker keeps interfering with my work (#2 at the link)
I kept documenting every time my coworker meddled her way into my tasks, duplicated efforts, or communicated with the client while bypassing me.
My manager supported my complaints, and repeatedly brought it up to her manager as well. Unfortunately the situation continued and the director of the department ended being looped in. My annoying coworker was transferred to a different team shortly afterwards, where her “proactive” approach seems to be way more appreciated. I haven’t had to communicate with her since, which has been a blessing because I was just a couple of thumbs-up emoji away from committing a crime.
4. Should I leave my job with great benefits but a problem boss? (first update)
I graduated with my master’s degree last month and am officially working as a mental health therapist. I absolutely love this work, and I feel like I’m finally doing something that brings me joy and purpose, as opposed to just punching the clock every day to be able to pay my bills. My husband recently got promoted, and it’s been amazing for us to both have our careers fall into place.
I did end up receiving a small settlement from that job that I originally wrote in about, and it helped as a cushion while I was working on grad school. I have not heard from anyone there since. My bipolar disorder is now very well managed, and I haven’t had a major episode since my hospitalization. Finally, we are currently in the process of adopting the most incredible 12-year-old girl. Our dream of a family and better jobs finally feels like it’s coming to fruition! I know it’s not feasible for everyone, but if you have the means and resources, please push back against illegal activity in your workplace! I hope that my old manager at least thinks twice now before he tries anything blatantly illegal.